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Wednesday, 23 November 2005

HRO Karl Willem at La Petit Blanc


His Royal Orangeness Karl Willem at Raymond Blanc's La Petit Blanc

Lila was off to New York so she invited His Royal Orangeness Karl Willem for dinner at one of Michelin-starred chef Raymond Blanc's restaurants in Jericho. Chef Blanc wasn't actually cooking this time but the food was generally okey. The dinner conversation oddly focused on lesbians and why Lila thought she was a lesbian at some point in her life. At dinner it showed because she ordered mussels for her main course. (Hello? Spaceship to planet earth..... The mussels were a bit young though and I was worried that we might get charged with paedophilia because back in the Islands where I live mussels are satisfyingly older and larger but still tasty). A real big shocker was Clinton's information that two of the prettiest girls I know are actually lesbians. Damn, why are all the beautiful girls either taken or gay?.....

HRO Karl Willem had a 2003 Domaine de Petit Roubie Marsanne and gives it 4 out of 5 stars

For HRO Karl Willem's main dish he chose corn-fed chicken with mushrooms. It was a bit overdone so HRO Karl Willem gave it 2 out of 5 stars

For dessert, HRO Karl Willem chose a croustillant of mango and passion fruit sorbet.

Autumn in London


Somebody please tell him that he needs to spread his wings and exercise. Oh what's that? He can't fly 'cause he's too heavy you say?

I spent the afternoon in central London today. I took a stroll in the parks then had an early dinner at a rather bad eat all you can restaurant in Leicester square. There was movie premiere so fanatics were already lined up along the barriers around the red carpet. They were real stalkers I think as it was only 4:30 and the celebrities would only be coming in at around 8ish. I liked the big sign on one cineplex which said "This is a Harry Potter-free Cinema". Thank you! I have no intention of watching the current Potter because I have yet to see the second and third film. I only saw the first film because I was babysitting my nephew. (On that note, let me just add that I'm proud to say I have NOT yet seen "Titanic"). I walked all the way to Paddington to catch the train back and was cursing myself when I got to Edgeware Road (ie. the Arab quarter). The food I saw there looked really good and people were happily smoking their sheesha pipes (which Prince Philip mistook for a 'bong' last week when he saw one at a student room in Ox. Having said that, how can you mistake a bong for a sheesha pipe??). I saw a really good Lebanese restaurant but I was already too full from all the crappy eat all you can food I had the mistake of getting. (Mental note to myself not to be takaw-tikim next time)..

Autumn trees......

The Atlantic Fleet gets ready to invade Troy

I had this cravings for donuts and where's the best place to get them? Follow the police, they know......

Park pigeons are so fat, they scare me....

This year's winter fashion color is funeral black...

Holiday lights are up early.....

Sunday, 20 November 2005

"Does this come in Black?" said the Girl buying bananas


The only place to find the sun in Middle Earth is indoors...

I was looking for a scarf today but I quickly gave up after the crush of mad and possessed women who were all over the stores. Girls are such lousy shoppers and very impulsive which is why they all end up with "Why the f_ck did I buy this all shite" in their wardrobes. We with the Y chromosomes do our research, from the most technical of details (thread count, comfort ratings) to the utilitarian (do I actually need this), before we go to the shops. Buying one item takes us no more than 30 minutes max (unless the salesperson is pretty, then we have to wait till closing time). It's all in the scientific journals. And girls have this genetic defect of wanting us boys to go shopping with them. Us boys, we do our shopping alone and meet up with our friends after. I have been out "shopping" with some mad mad women in the past and everytime I thought I'd rather walk barefoot up Mt. Pulag in the middle of a typhoon. Girls seem to want to see a single design in every colour and in three sizes! (Why does one want to buy the same outfit in 3 colors? So you can be one Power Ranger each day of the week?) I only have one waistline, and it's 29. I won't go to a shop asking for a 28, 27, or 26 "just in case" as most women do. Why do girls have to ask "Do I look fat in this?" when they are trying out a dress which is two sizes smaller than the actual? Do they think that the laws of basic physics suddenly do not apply in the changing room and all that matter will just disappear because they managed to take a mere 40 minutes (and I want those 40 minutes back) trying to fit in a teeeny weeny outfit? This is also why women cannot shop online. They do not know what number to put on the "Size" query even if they were just buying a scarf......

I gave up on the shopping bit and hid at the Ashmolean Cafe and picked up a random magazine

Really? I never knew this. ......

No. Once a vegetarian, always a vegetarian.

We Must Ask the Oracle


Ice forms on our Arachnid friends' arty home.

I once held my new friend Lila in high esteem. Her Royal pedigree, growing up in different places around the world, and her countless diplomas were more than enough to earn my respect. A while ago, I threw it all out the window. For Lila is also *Cirque du Soleil Announcer voice here* - Madame Lila the Amazing! Tadaaa! At dinner in the fringes of Middle Earth (fyi: Northern Ox, where all the mistresses live) hosted by James and Lourdes, Lila volunteered her palm-reading "talents". Divination is actually a very wonderful gift, except that Lila has blue-blood connections and this is where it all goes wrong. Remember Adolf, Saddam, Czar Nic, and the Burmese Military Junta? They all relied on crystal-ball gazers. Fortunately, I was given some assurances that Lila had no intention of being a political/royal adviser and so I quickly opened my palm for her to read.......

This is my left palm. According to *Cirque du Soleil Announcer voice here* - Madame Lila the Amazing! this palm shows my past and present. My disconnected love line says I have only ever loved once (really? don't crushes count?) and that I'm emotionally disconnected (Hmm, at a card reading during the summer, this was also mentioned. I have a heart of gold but I'm not opening the mines just yet). My career line shows that I have a multiple personality disorder (True, I am bisexual - I love both girls and lesbians). My life line thankfully is long (Whew, I wasn't about to give up on 'extreme' sports anyway) and my money line shows I have a slight cash flow problem. (D'uh I'm a poor student. Didn't you notice that my D&G jacket and Giorgo Armani jumpers are two seasons ago?? I have to skip a week's lunch just so I can buy a Zegna tie which is already on sale!). I must admit that Lila's reading is spot on. Of course, I think she probably googled me and read my biography somewhere...isn't that how most televangelists operate? My assessment? Lila is as good as Legolas in stating the obvious.

And my right palm which according to *Cirque du Soleil Announcer Voice here* Madame Lila the Amazing! shows my future. Some of the revelations (ie. love child with an Icelandic beauty from a week of lust and passion in Rejkavik..etc) are too personal to be broadcast on the net so I'm not going to. Incidentally, feel free to read my palm dear blog readers (as of last count 9 people read my blog.....wuuu-ha!)

I walked home at 3am in time for the freezing fog. I wonder where Jack the Ripper is, I need to borrow a Staedler cutter for my arts project......

Saturday, 19 November 2005

Spread Your Love Like Fever


All the leaves are gone..............and all the flights to Morocco are booked, so I'm stuck here for winter....

I have the colds. There is no reason why I should be selfish and bear this blessing all alone. Misery loves company and so today I was on a mission to spread the love. I'm going to skip the usual continental bisous bisous (beso beso) and go full Slavic/Mafioso three kisses minimum on all the friends I see today PLUS a long hug, and a tight handshake.

I felt like the evil WalMart, opening "franchises" everywhere. Look, a healthy immune system! Let's go and colonize it!. Walking along Christchurch meadow, I met no less than 3 acquaintances. I beso-beso'd, handshaked, and hugged them as if they were long lost friends. Nevermind that I saw them just yesterday. Heck, even Fiona who was circuit-jogging I beso-beso'd, handshaked, and hugged the THREE times she passed me. (Yes, seeing that she's in good health, better to give her an increased dose just to make sure the viral package gets delivered.)

The River Cherwell.....

It's autumn and trees will be bald soon

The Towers of Middle Earth as viewed from Christchurch meadow....

I think I might be going vegetarian soon....

Friday, 18 November 2005

Inexhaustible Supply of Natural Gas Found


My heart is red, but it's still as cold as ice........

The arrival of the artic winter heralds the end of the sweet-potato eating season. I simply hate wearing thermal underwear (long johns/thermals) no matter how manufacturers claim that they are "breathable". See, whenever one farts, the hot air is NOT quickly dissipated but instead inflates the posterior-hugging part of the thermals inducing a warm and fuzzy feeling. And second, after I remove my thermals, so much static electricity has been stored that putting on my pyjamas causes prickly arc discharges from the hair tips of my moderately hairy legs (I just shudder to think what my Greek friends experience). I could probably power one village from this untapped energy source. Come to think of it, perhaps I should eat more fart-inducing delicacies (CompaƱero, pase los enchiladas y burritos. Por favor!) . Then, I'd harness all these gases from my thermals and become the next energy oligarch! Hmmm, I should start practicing my Russian now and visit those mail order catalogues.........

Helios struggles to pierce the freezing fog......

I guess flip flops are out of the question.....


My neighbours. How do they cope with this deathly cold?

Brrr....it's that cold.......

Wednesday, 16 November 2005

La Luna esta Loca


It's a full moon and I'm going loco....

The artic winter has finally arrived (hey, I thought it was still autumn) which meant that it was time to bring out the bulky down-insulated jackets. I hate these big jackets. If only I brought my "Baguio"-bonnet then I wouldn't need to wear a jacket. The "Baguio"-bonnet is way way up there in terms of insulation high-techie-ness. Even with the freezing Siberian winds and the frost you could wear shorts and sleeveless tops as long as you are wearing the "Baguio"-bonnet. Heck, I can probably climb Mt. Everest wearing only a "Baguio"-bonnet. This has been proven millions of times by the tourists who come up to Baguio during the coldest months, packing only the skimpiest of outfits, and are shocked to see natives (ie. me) being sensible by wearing 3-layered clothing.

Anywho, I went home at 1am the other day and it was below freezing. Fortunately, there was a full moon and the sky was clear for star-gazing. "It's so cold, I can't feel my legs" said the man next to me in the pub. I should have reminded him that that's to be expected if you're an amputee, but I guess it wasn't a good time to tell him that with the already depressing cold weather and all.

Dark, eerie, foreboding. A man in white is said to appear here before dawn......oh wait, that's just the milkman....

I've lived in really old and historical places since I came to these shores and contrary to my expectations, Middle Earth is not that haunted. I often work late and have the building all to myself and you would expect that some ghostly apparition would pay me a visit. Surely some macabre event must have occurred in a 16th century building and a restless soul was reaching out for closure? But no, I have yet to see a ghost. I have grown up and I am no longer afraid of ghosts. I even have lunch at a graveyard (The Vaults). In fact, one shouldn't fear ghosts, its the LIVING that one should be scared of. *insert Best Chris Rock impersonation* If you was walkin alone at night and you see a LIVING person in a dark alley, Run Muthafucka! Run! A ghost in a dark corner can't hurt you, but a LIVING person can steal yo iPod, it can mug ya ass, and rape ya!" A ghost has an excuse to be up at 1 fucking am in a dark corner while a LIVING person ain't *end Chris Rock impersonation*


Many jilted lovers have jumped from the Bridge of Sighs...........but they don't really haunt this place because the jump is only 20 feet, the most you will get is a broken ankle.......

At 1am, the walk home was boring, no vampires, no ghostly carriages, no hair-raising surprises, no high pitched screams to break the silence.......except the sound of moaning from the 18th century abodes on both sides.....

This is the reason why I don't cycle during winter. I need to protect my crown jewels, the little mini-me's in my balls need to be kept at 37C...

Friday, 11 November 2005

Yeah, Mon


Fried plantains from Jamaica.....sweet like me
My friend Karen passed her transfer viva and threw a Jamaican Party. I offered to help as I'm always keen on improving my fledgling cooking skills. The headcount was a humongous 40 people. I have never chopped so many habaƱero chilis, cabbages, and onions in my entire life yet everyone in the kitchen was having fun. Despite the cold weather, the full sensory attack from the food transported us all to the sunny Caribbean. At the after-dinner drinks, I did a poll on whether dreadlocks would look good on me (should I continue to grow my hair long). There is of course the "slight" problem that my hair is very straight as pointed out by some of the guests. Yet, the votes have been cast and the results: %75, yes the Nashman can have dreadlocks, 25% no, the Nashman should dye his hair blonde and kill Legolas instead. Excellent! That deserves another shot of Caribbean rum mon.

As it was a Caribbean dinner, the poison of choice was Rum. I got quite tipsy with the "Overproof Rum" which did not carry any indication of its actual alcohol content on the label. I guess it's better not to know....or maybe I have gone blind......

Chantal's refreshing salad with the rather O.C. touch of slicing the grapes in two

My oven was packed with banana cake. If only this blog had smellavision, I could share the heavenly scent of banana, vanilla, nutmeg, and orange....

That punch contained ten times the legal alcohol content for 'punch'. Karen prepared goat curry (the goat meat was Jamaican, I kid you not), roast pork, rice with red beans, and the Jamaican national fruit called ackee. Of course, Uncle Bob Marley was playing in the background.

This is not Jamaican, nor Japanese. Karen's friend brought homemade Korean Kimbap. It was wonderful. For this alone, she will be invited to my future parties ......

My kitchen after the hungry masses came, saw, and devoured....