Thursday, 30 November 2006

Someone's Cast A Spell On Me

My juju is stronger than your juju.........

Someone must be trying to cast a black magic spell on me. First, my colleagues have gone down with the flu but thanks to my strong third world immune system, I may be a bit weakened but I am still standing. Two, my friend's birthday is up this Saturday but I can't join her as I'm working that day. Finally, this is the worst part - my library crush (she's crush number 4 but she is as hot as the rest of them) who I've been stalking (who in fact stole my coffee in hall last weekend) decided to sit in that dark corner of the library where there is no electrical socket! My laptop battery is drained and to sit there next to her pretending to work with a laptop that is turned off kinda blows my cover. I could pretend to be reading a book but all the books around are in Latin. (Tang-ina nga naman ang malas ano.) Anyways, whoever you are trying to cast bad vibes on me, I will find you and you will pay dearly. (Binabalaan kita sherap, bumalik ka na sa pinanggalingan mo at puno na ang salop.) The force is strong in me and my magick will vanquish you.

Anyways, there are just some days when you wish there were more hours in the day....

'Oh dear! Oh dear! I shall be late' - The Nashman in Wonderland

I attended a talk by Alfred Bader, the founder of one of the world's largest chemical companies and who is also a very prominent Rembrandt collector, last night. The very exclusive audience comprised only 25 or so people including me except that I was probably the only one in the audience who was aged below 26, whose bank account only had 3 significant figures (ang masakit pa non, eh peso kiddie-saver account), and who did not own a single Old Master painting. Everyone else was some art historian, art collector, or art dealer.

Anything involving Rembrandt is like a good conspiracy/mystery/puzzle/thriller novel that you can't put down. Rembrandt had lots of very good students (Fabritius, Bol, Hoogstraten) which means it's really hard to tell which paintings are Rembrandts, copies, or from his students. The Dutch government has spent gazillions of guilders classifying all Rembrandtesque paintings into three groups - "A" paintings are 'accepted' as by Rembrandt, "B" paintings are 'bothersome' (not sure), and "C" paintings are from Rembrandt's 'circle' (coming from his workshop). Out of the original 600 paintings that have turned up, just over a hundred are "A" paintings and every decade or so, paintings get reclassifed. This is where the fun/intrigue/mystery/dealing begins. Bader himself has amassed lots of "A", "B", and "C" paintings and he narrated how often he would take a gamble at auction for a "C" painting which is later proven to be an "A" painting. But for me, the more interesting stories are those on "A" paintings that have been recently relegated as "C" paintings. (Kasakit naman, lalo if you paid $7M on it tapos "C" lang pala talaga.)

One interesting theory is that Rembrandt may have also signed some works by his students. Like during the renaissance, it was not uncommon for a painting to be a collaborative work between the maestro and his students.

The Mennonite Minister......the face was definitely painted by Rembrandt, but the body was not. Still classifed as an "A" Rembrandt.

After his very engaging talk, I invited Prof. Bader to Baguio to have a look at one of the paintings in my collection which I think is an "A" Rembrandt and asked if he might be interested in buying it from me for £1.5M.

I described the painting to him in detail but he said Rembrandt did not paint "Dogs playing pool and poker" and that there is no "Made China" tag on any of the Rembrandt frames. Ever.
Are you sure? I prodded. The man who dealt it to me said it was original Uu suki, uridjinal itu. Pagbilhin mu, bigyan pa kita bagu dbd ni Epril Booy. Tang-ina na-gancho ako.

After rubbing shoulders with the art cognosceti, I had to run with my Reed's Bootery bespoke shoes to college for another set of talks, this time on film and photography. The Belgian photographer Doug Vernimmen showed some very nice baby pictures while Stanford Film Professor Jan Krawitz explained the motivations for her last film which was about midgets. (Tangna yung talent manager ko ha. Dapat ako ang bida sa pelikulang ito. Lilipat na ako sa Star Circle.)

We're so alcholic. Even fricking dessert has alcohol.

Belgian chocolates and wine during the evening lecture. Only in Middle Earth. In my alma mater SLU, you can't bring any alcoholic beverage of any sort inside campus. Even if it's already in your belly. Wait, there is actually a double standard - the priests have lots of wine in their rooms.

This is Maverick to Flight Control. I have visual on two landing strips. Which one is a go? Over. - Top Gone

At dinner I was sat in front of the technical manager for the Formula 1 team Super Aguri-Honda. They're a small upstart which started racing only this season. Their operating budget is in the less than $100M range (compared to the main Honda Team which spends $800Mish). They've built 5 cars (three of which race) and I offered to test drive (or more accurately, 'crash') one of the cars despite the fact that I have no driver's license. (I crashed my uncle's rusty Chevy when I was 11 and since then I have never driven again but I will change my mind for an F1 car. And just in case you were wondering, in Benguet, we learn to drive at a very early age because 11 year olds can't carry sacks of potatoes to help in the farm but they're tall enough to reach the pedals of a Ford Fiera.) Anyways, my friend Kerry asked the usual question on whether F1 success is more about the car or the driver. (Ano sa tingin mo?) Incidentally, F1 drivers whose last names are not Schumacher can expect to earn $7M a year. Not bad eh? I think I know some Trancoville jeepney drivers who can drive an F1 car. Imperialists from Manila may say that Edsa bus drivers make better F1 drivers but they only ever do straight tracks.

As usual, The Nashman prefers to sit at the end of the table.

The starter. Our chef is so OC. I just had to ask the Dean though who's idea was it to serve red wine with the fish main dish? Not that I'm complaining, I'll drink a good red with anything.

After dinner, my friend (that girl with glasses) said she wanted to get something off her chest and wanted to share a little secret. I did a preemptive strike and whispered on her ear what I thought it was. I was correct. I've known her for three years now and tonight this evil evil secret will undoubtedly put our friendship to the test. It's so immoral and unethical I can't even put it here on my online diary. I need to go to confession with a Cardinal now.....we've committed a very grave sin. (It involves pressing some buttons.)

I don't know why we had Tiramisu for dessert. In Italy, Tiramisu is one of the more overt signals that one is single and available. (It's a pick-me-up sign.) I'm single, but I'm NOT available. For God has a plan for me. I'm going to be a nun and start and all girls' school....


rene said...

>I've known her for three years
>now and tonight this evil evil
>secret will undoubtedly put our
>friendship to the test. It's so
>immoral and unethical I can't even
>put it here on my online diary.

email mo na lang sa akin ha. hehe. hindi naman ako madaldal. but i like to hear kinky stories. hehe.

The Nashman said...

Kinky not.

We both actually figured out independently how to hack the vending machine. By pressing ----- followed by --- we can get free unlimited soda and coffee. Isn't that amazing?

We did stay up till midnight analysing the ramifications of our actions. Are we going to hell? Were we stretching the laws of economics? How does free soda affect our morals? Can we look at our children and say what we did was right?...........aaaargh.....

the jester-in-exile said...

putsa reeds bootery... talk about blast from the past haha

aravis said...

Hi! Are your Reeds Bootery shoes still whole? I want to order a pair for my mom and I've been looking for reviews but haven't had any luck yet.