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Thursday, 28 December 2006

Shite Happens

Just when I thought that I'd leave 2006 with a clean bill of health, I suddenly fall ill. I've been nursing a fever for the past two days. My butt has been stuck to bed like the congressmen leeches to their pork barrel.

I feel like the poor dork who got his pinkie finger clipped by a machine just 3 days before the plant was due to break the "This plant has been accident free for 1000 days blah blah.." record. People who work in the semiconductor industry can relate to this. Instead of feeling sorry for the bloke who lost one finger, he gets reprimanded for derailing another middle management ISO gimmick. Yet, rightfully so, for being stupid and careless. (Semiconductor machines are actually highly automated and idiot-proof. It's always a mystery worthy of Sherlock Holmes how people get injured by these machines.)

I'm all alone so no other human is going to take care of me while I recuperate. Thankfully, I have the ever-reliable PA/PR Gromit who is truly indispensable in the Orange household.


HRO Karl Willem and PA/PR Gromit prepare brunch of spinach and ricotta quiche and fresh coffee. They're such angels.

For dinner PA/PR Gromit and HRO Karl Willem made pizza and soup.

PA/PR Gromit made risotto and wild mushroom soup and jazzed up an of-the-shelf pizza with mozzarella, tomatoes, tabasco, and spices.

The Beeb has made another adaptation of Bram Stoker's Dracula. I have eagerly awaited this retelling the way Kate Moss looks forward to the arrival of a new shipment of white fairy dust from Colombia . As everyone knows by now, I'm a card-carrying vampire lover. My most recent attempt to meet one at the Pere Lachaise cemetery ended in a farce and my solitary walk inside the dreaded Parisian catacombs was very disappointing. Sadly, winter solstice has ended and the days are getting longer again. Fortunately, the library lent me a master key to our underground archives. Before I got sick, I've been looking at 16th-18th century books and manuscripts hoping to unearth more creepy information about the vampire myth. (More on this later.)


BBC1's Dracula adapted by Stewart Harcourt with Marc Warren as the Count.

HRO Karl Willem, PA/PR Gromit, and The Nashman watch the new Dracula Film. The best part is that we're all alone. Come and get us Mina Harker. Phhwoar!

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