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Saturday, 13 June 2009

Genuine Brand New Antique Made to Order Here



Just so you know, this program is one of the Beeb's flagship programs. It's been running for ages. Basically, people scour their attics or mug their grandparents for 'priceless' antiques which they then bring to experts who look at it, make tut-tut sounds, and deliver history-laden and factoid weighted spiels with ridiculously posh accents.

The Nashman's role in this program was not as physically demanding as his short cameo in the Oscar Wilde adaptation of last year (apparently, the producers were scared The Nashman would end up in the 'factual/Anachronism mistakes' section of IMDB, ie, there were no brown monkeys in Oxbarrio in the 1920s) but this is prime time baby.

Throughout the day, the garbage made in China imitations are weeded out and filming begins in the afternoon when only the gems remain. As you know, being a demanding film star who is concerned with Craft, this is the only time The Nashman makes his Emmy-award winning appearance.


Lola, hwag niyo ng ibenta. Aanhin niyo pera kung sakali eh malapit na kayong kunin ni Lord. Pamana mo nalang sa akin...

And where you keep it Madame? Oh, I use it as an arinola......

No madame, it is not a pleasuring tool. The Maoris used it to bash their enemies heads....

...but I noticed some strange marks. Have you been using it while your husband was away? For this, a conservative estimate is £1500....

It most certainly is not a Timex. Look at the escapement.

I think this pair of watches were valued at £20,000. Asan ang Salisi gang when you need them??

Lola bows her head in prayer. Lord, please make it an expensive set...please....

Can we use it as bowling pins?

Presenting the girl with no belly button. Methinks she in the wrong show. Dapat sa perya siya...pero in fernez, maganda dyoga niya, just the right size.

A paramedic team was on standby...most of the crowd was 80-something.

I believe, madame, this is a Melaware bowl made by Orocan used by the Royal Sultanate of Culiat and available at all Tiong San Bazar Stores. If you auction it now, the auctioneer can probably use it as a spittoon.

The Nashman directing this segment. Camera two, pan over to girl in the crowd with a red top. I'm afraid her boobs are fake but a good fake nonetheless, we must have a closer look...

The Nashman takes hold of HD Camera 3. TheBBC are such nice folks! I showed them my PRC ECE license (expired) and the let me adjust volume and treble controls. Sweet.

Tryptich, originally bought for $200. Appraised at $4000. Ayan madir, may pambili ka na ng matinong outfit ha.

Now this is a real find. The case has a Romanoff crest! And although it doesn't have a Faberge mark.....

..the initials suggest a Faberge worker and the crest hints at a Romanoff commission. It's estimated to be worth £8000.....

..and so The Nashman quickly went behind the host.....Mag-ingat sa mandurukot...may Pinoy sa tabi...

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